9 Ways I know I’m Old
As if Looking in the Mirror Wasn’t Enough of a Clue
Recently, my friend Amy posted something on Facebook about her New York Times subscription. A conversation ensued whereby it became clear that I was the only person in my digital social circle still getting our physical home-town paper delivered to my doorstep every day. I am also the oldest person who participated in that conversation by at least seven years.
Coincidence? I think not.
Clearly, not only is my body changing: my skin, my eyesight, my ability to remember names…anyone’s name (It’s embarrassing and insane), but my behavior is equally off-kilter. Not because it’s changed, but because it hasn’t. It all got me wondering: what else do I do that the young whippersnappers don’t? Aside from calling people whippersnappers, I mean.
1. I Have a Landline and Cable
The landline is akin to the newspaper: I don’t use it much, but when I do, it’s a superior experience and easier to hold. My mother doesn’t even call me on my landline anymore, and she’s pushing 90. So why do I keep it? Because you never know when there will be a power outage and I’ll need to call 911. You never know when a cyber attack will affect the grid and wipe out all cellular connections. If that happens, I’ll be able to call…well, no one. Because I’m…
